I didn’t expect a children’s movie to wreck me. But here we are.
By the third time I watched The Wild Robot, I realized it wasn’t just a movie—it was a full-blown existential gut punch wrapped in children’s animation.
And it was this line that did it:
“In order to survive, sometimes you need to be more than you were programmed to be.”
A simple sentence. But it cracked something open.
Because isn’t that what life is?
We start with a certain programming.
• You’re the responsible one.
• You’re the funny one.
• You’re the one who always has it together.
Until one day, life throws something at you that doesn’t fit the code.
For me, that moment was my brain injury.
I went from knowing exactly who I was to staring at a grocery list, having no idea why I was holding it. From independent to moving back in with my parents at 41. From handling anything to struggling just to finish a sentence.
And let me tell you—there’s nothing quite like trying to explain to someone mid-conversation that you forgot what you were saying… and also why you were saying it in the first place.
People would just stare at me.
And I’d stare back like, Yeah, same, dude.
That’s when I realized:
The old me? He wasn’t coming back.
I had to become more than I ever expected to be.
Not because I wanted to. Because I had to.
And honestly? Isn’t that all of us?
That’s why The Wild Robot hit so hard.
It’s about a robot—built with a purpose—who finds herself stranded, completely alone. No instructions. Just survival.
She wasn’t programmed to adapt. She wasn’t programmed to feel.
But somewhere along the way, she did.
She formed connections. She learned to love, to protect, to care—even though she was never taught how.
Because sometimes, survival isn’t just about adapting.
It’s about discovering a part of yourself you didn’t know existed.
Here’s the thing:
We spend so much of our lives clinging to who we used to be.
But sometimes, survival isn’t just about holding on—it’s about becoming something new.
The real transformation? It’s about discovering a part of yourself that was always there—waiting.
The version of you that got through yesterday? May not be the one who can take you where you’re meant to go next.
And that’s not failure. That’s evolution.
Because we were never meant to stay programmed.
We were meant to grow, adapt, and awaken to something deeper inside us.
Not just to survive—but to truly live.
And if we’re lucky, along the way, we meet others who remind us:
We are always capable of becoming more. ❤️
In service of the journey, always—Unworthy Illuminator – Beckett
There's a truth that's been circulating online lately, one that's stopping people in their tracks: "You'll never feel safe with someone who gets angry at you for being upset over something they did."
Simple words. Profound impact.
For many reading this right now, these words just cracked open something you've been trying to understand for months, maybe years. That gut-wrenching feeling when you're apologizing, yet again, for being hurt by someone else's actions.
They do something hurtful. You feel hurt. They get angry about your hurt. You end up apologizing.
It's like being in a play where the script keeps changing, but somehow you always end up being the one saying sorry.
To anyone who's ever:
Typed and deleted a message twenty times
Rehearsed a conversation endlessly before having it
Waited for the "perfect moment" to bring up an issue
Apologized for crying about something someone else did
Found themselves comforting the person who hurt them
Let's talk about what's really happening here, because once you see it, you can't unsee it.
When someone gets angry at you for having feelings about their actions, they're not actually angry at your response. They're angry that they can't control your response.
Think about that for a second.
They're not upset that they hurt you. They're upset that you had the audacity to be hurt.
It's like someone stepping on your foot and then getting mad at you for saying "ouch."
A reader messaged me recently: "I spent three years thinking I was 'too sensitive' before realizing they were just refusing to be accountable."
That's the thing about emotional manipulation - it's not always dramatic. Sometimes it's as quiet as making yourself smaller and smaller until you can fit into the spaces between someone else's anger.
You learn to:
Calculate your words carefully
Monitor their moods constantly
Minimize your own feelings
Walk on emotional eggshells
And the whole time, you think you're being "mature" or "keeping the peace."
But here's what no one tells you:
Peace isn't supposed to cost you your peace.
Your feelings aren't a democracy. Your hurt doesn't need validation. Your emotional reality isn't up for debate.
And anyone who tries to make you feel guilty for having feelings about their actions is showing you exactly who they are.
To everyone who's doubting their reality right now: Your feelings are valid. Your hurt matters. Your experiences are real.
That voice inside you that's whispering "something isn't right"? That's not anxiety talking. That's wisdom.
Trust it.
Because here's the truth: Healthy people -people capable of real connection and genuine love - don't punish others for having feelings about their actions.
They might not always understand. They might need time to process. They might even feel defensive initially.
But they don't turn your pain into a weapon against you.
Your feelings are the receipts of your experience. And anyone who gets angry at you for keeping those receipts is probably worried about what they've been charging to your emotional account.
Start listening to that quiet voice inside that knows the truth. The one that's been trying to tell you all along:
You deserve to feel safe expressing your feelings. You deserve to be heard without being punished. You deserve to exist in your full emotional reality.
No apologies needed.
Sometimes, naming what's happening is the first step to breaking free from it. If these words resonate with you, you're not alone. Share them with someone who might need to hear this today.
Because the truth is, we're all just trying to feel safe in our relationships. And that starts with being able to feel our feelings without fear.
Stay true to yourself.
If this post made you feel seen, made you think, made you realize something - you're part of a community that understands. Let's keep this conversation going - Fahim Chughtai
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Think of it like this: Imagine you’re lost in the desert, desperately thirsty. Suddenly, someone offers you a bottle of water. Does it matter if that person hurt you before? Does it matter if the water might be poisoned? Your survival instincts are screaming ‘DRINK!’ That’s exactly what’s happening in your brain right now.
This is where trauma bonding comes into play, and it’s more sinister than most people realize. Every time they hurt you and then comforted you, they weren’t just manipulating your emotions — they were literally rewiring your brain. You became addicted not just to them, but to the cycle of pain and relief.
What society thinks recovering from sexual violence involves:
learning to have sex again
What recovery from sexual violence really involves:
learning to breathe without panicking
learning to exercise again
Learning to trust again
Healing the physical injuries from the attack
Healing the emotional pain
Learning who will stand with you as you remake your life
Grieving the people who let you down
Remaking a new relationship with your body
Learning to dress your body in a way that helps you feel safe
Learning to sleep through the night again
Developing a new worldview that incorporates the horrific things you've learned humans inflict on each other
And so, so, so many other things.
Sexual trauma impacts every aspect of the survivor's life. No-one should have to recover alone.
